Mar 18, 2013

How to Make Your Boyfriend Happy


      I think there comes a time when every girl in a relationship asks herself: "Am I being a good girlfriend?" There also comes a time when every boy asks himself: "Am I being a good boyfriend?" but I think the discrepancy between the frequency of male vs. female self-inquisition is so vast that you could fit the entire Grand Canyon and at least 3 adult, well-fed African elephants (not Indian, those are smaller) in it.
      I'm not claiming that I'm the epitome of a perfect girlfriend, who always puts the happiness of her man first, don't get me wrong. If you asked my boyfriend, he'd tell you that he's a pretty miserable son of a gun, thanks to me. Let's be honest - there are more important things to strive for than my man's happiness, like global peace, saving the whales and making my own selfish self happy just to list a few from the top of my head. But I do have some tricks up my sleeve for anyone who actually wants to do something nice for their partner and make them a happier person.
  1. Learn how to squirt.
  2. Grow another boob.
  3. If you're thinking about growing another vagina - you already have one. Use it. Anal.
  4. Shut up.
  5. Speak up during and only during sex.
  6. For a month, pretend you're dumber than him. Sorry, not as smart as him.
  7. Another one very important is - anal.
  8. Tell him that you like his mother. Honestly.
  9. Tear down your Robert Pattinson posters and make one with his picture that says "Team Lloyd" or whatever his name is.
  10. And I can't believe I almost forgot - anal.
      You don't have to be upset or offended by any of my suggestions, there's also a simpler solution, an easier way out: You can let him help you pick your outfit. That's what Coco does for Ice T and that man looks pretty content to me, although that might be due to all of her junk in the trunk. And "under the hood" too. I'm too lazy to do anything else and to my defense, learning how to squirt does look like a lot of work, so I decided to do what Coco does and we've come up with this:


I'm wearing:
Faux leather pants: Newyorker
Blazer: eBay
Top: Newyorker
Tassel earrings: DIY
Boots: Pittarello

      Whether you think you're a good boyfriend/girlfriend or not, now be a good boy/girl and like, share and/or follow to help increase the number of happy men on the planet. There are new posts coming up every Monday, Wednesday and Friday so see you again this Wednesday!

      Peet

58 comments:

  1. When I read the title of your blog, I thought .. Oh, no she's reading WAY too much Cosmopolitan magazine .. lol.

    Nice to see that you didn't lose your edgy tone :-)

    Monica
    www.pear-shaped-gal.com

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    Replies
    1. Worry not, I read one Cosmopolitan a year during summer because it requires little cognitive function and I hardly take it to heart.:) Thank you for reading and liking my edgy tone!;)

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  2. Haha, love your cheeky "how to" lists! I think it would make my boyfriend's life if I grew a third boob. He's literally mentioned that he'd love it ;) Men! Really like the earrings you're wearing here :)

    -Jen

    www.vibrantbeautyblog.com

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  3. Laughing my ass off - this is hilarious. You're right though - letting you dude pick your outfit is not the disaster you might first imagine, they usually pick things you wouldn't have thought of and are a bit skankier (not necessarily a bad thing) you may end up looking smoking hot!
    Another way you can be a better girlfriend is looking after yourself being happy - and with that in mind I'm going shoe shopping.

    ♥ Paula Shoe Fiend.
    http://shoe-fiend.blogspot.co.uk/

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  4. love those pants babe!
    you wear them well.

    xo
    ola
    www.stylesbyola.com

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  5. I love your honesty, and I think your boyfriend absolutely adores you after reading this!

    XO
    www.bordeauxbravoure.blogspot.com

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  6. i dont know why i laugh with these suggestions. theyre probably the most honest and true things to work out or explore more options in a relationship.

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  7. Hi, thank you for your visit in my blog.
    If you want we can follow each other. Let me know :)
    Have a nice day
    http://www.margifashion.blogspot.cz/

    ReplyDelete
  8. Great post!! LOVE IT :)

    XoXo
    Teresa
    http://www.chicaffordable.blogspot.com

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  9. I read #1 and lost it. This is so fuckin good.

    xo Ashley
    thetiniestfirecracker.com

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  10. Haha, my boyfriend would love if I followed all a majority of these steps..


    myblissisthisway.blogspot.com

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  11. By the comments you can tell who is actually reading and who is copying and pasting! Lol.

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  12. Cool pants!

    http://fashionbrunette.blogspot.com

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  13. Now you see I'm just far too lazy to have a boyfriend. I've been single for a good 4 years now, such that my parents are even beginning to ask if I'm batting for the other side. The truth is I find it hard work holding down a boyfriend because like you I think there are more important things to focus your efforts on than trying to keep a man happy. Even some of your suggestions just seem quite laborious and quite frankly a pain in the backside! (pun intended)

    Your fella seems to have a sharp eye for fashion though!

    http://forcailini.blogspot.com

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  14. love the outfit! and those earrings!!1 :) xo, Alma
    http://www.soulofashopper.com

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  15. we love your pants, and also found your suggestions amusing LOL , well if they work for you :p


    love from the NANA girls xoxo

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  16. Wow I absolutely love this look! It's such a simple outfit, but you did such a good job on the color blocking that it creates a really bold effect! Great post :)

    http://www.themirroronthewall.com/

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  17. That pants and blazer are so nice. Have a great day.

    http://www.fashiondenis.com/

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  18. Great look dear! love your pants!! :)
    thanks for your comment on my blog!

    The Fashion Heels
    Facebook
    Bloglovin
    Twitter

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  19. simple outfit with great impact ! love it hunn!
    ohhh ntw, cant stop smiling reading this post heheeee

    love,
    Yati

    http://yatiinoah.blogspot.com/

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  20. great post!

    http://onecolourorathemedaybyday.blogspot.com

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  21. Fabulous outfit!

    http://theprintedsea.blogspot.de/

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  22. ....I love your pants but I hate that you look so skinny in this great outfit, makes me even more hungry and feelin FAT. Anyway, I didn't know they made earrings you could wipe the floor with, I find it very practical ^^

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  23. Very funny =)
    I like the outfit a lot. I want a white blazer now!

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  24. That was hilarious, I had to share. I couldn't stop laughing. XD You have a great sense of humor.

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  25. Nice outfit doll!*
    Love the combination!*

    xXx

    luxachic.com

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  26. Awesome

    http://alyxtheprincess.blogspot.com

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  27. hello sweetie!
    Thanks a lot for visiting and commenting my blog. I really like yours - it's quite interesting and I totally identify myself with it. I'm your new follower now and would love you to follow back if you like my blog as well. Thanks a lot for your feedback.
    have a nice week
    kisses
    Aida Camilo
    from
    http://cottoncandy-peaches.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  28. love your pants! Nice to meet you

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  29. Great post! Love it!!

    http://mentrend.blogspot.be/

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  30. nice look!!! love your leather pants

    http://lestyledelapetiteblonde.blogspot.com.es/

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  31. Ahahaha you are amazing, I love your posts, always so funny! Reminds me of Max from 2 Broke Girls a lot, especially the points about anal!

    Damn it, now I know why I was dumped: I don't know how to squirt and I only have two boobs!!! Bummer!

    Oh and thanks a lot for your comment on my last whiny post. I thought about looking for a room mate after the breakup but then decided against it because I cannot for the life of me live together somebody else but my boyfriend. I'm too weird and selfish for that ;)
    I could rather use a friend who comes here when I come home from work and then leaves when I want to go to bed. This would be perfect - but it's utopic, so I'm trying to get comfortable with being alone with the help of beer, pizza and lots of movies instead. ;)

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  32. This post is amazing, I laughed my ass off! The outfit turned out really nice, bravo to your man!

    Meant To Attend

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  33. in love with this whole look!! loving that crisp white blazer !! and ofcourse your post made my day!!
    xx

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  34. OMG those earrings!! LOVE THEM :D

    http://thegoldenpaillettes.blogspot.com/

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  35. Earrings. xxx

    reallyliteral.blogspot.com

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  36. Perfect style !!

    Internationnal Swarovski GIVEWAY
    CONCOURS Swarovski

    http://www.mademoisellemode.com/concours-2/international-giveway-concours-swarovski-5402

    Kisses

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  37. Awwww you look marvelous in this outfit Peet.....& your suggestions/recomms are soooo hilarious!!!

    Rebecca
    www.redtagchiclosangeles.com

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  38. When I read this I showed it to my guy friend but he had to leave after reading the first one, "squirt" and after coming back home he was literally BEGGING for your link to this post HAHAHAHAHAHA Okay, he is getting happier with every word he read and getting even more excited with anal. LOL! Awesome post Peet!!

    Well I didn't had that good of an experience of letting my ex pick my outfit because he inherited my grandmother's taste some how. Can't leave house unless if I am NOT wearing a sleeveless top, no skirts, no long hair omgoodness. I don't even know how we dated. Well, lets just hope the next one is better =P

    I like your earring and your smile in this post. One rare smile! <3

    mish
    www.mishberries.com

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  39. Lookin great!!! love the pants and the statement earings!

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  40. nice styling!

    Check out my GIVEAWAY!
    http://carolinakrews.blogspot.com/

    xo,
    Carolina

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  41. haha love your post! great outfit!
    xx Kate

    The Style Department

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  42. love your pants.

    If you get a sec, check out my latest post 'Wrapped in Black and White'.
    Have a great weekend.
    Sofia

    stylishlyinlove.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  43. OMG this is so funny. hahahahahaha
    aside from that, i have those pants as well! you rock them well babe!

    xx

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  44. such a lovely blog :)
    would you like to follow each other?
    www.lusciousstyle.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  45. Like your pants!
    http://anjasfashionblog.blogspot.ch

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  46. nice blog - take a look at my blog as well :D www.tothevenusandback.com

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  47. Hahaha..great post!

    Love the red pants.

    xo,
    Dani

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  48. haha this cracked me up. thanks for your comment on my blog, love your trousers! xx

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  49. Hahahaha! Ok so anal it is :P Love your outfit girl! It's awesome! xoxo

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  50. I really need leather pants right now, even though it's just about to get too hot for them here, I will sweat and look fabulous doing it!

    www.unholystyle.blogspot.com

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  51. Haha this post made me laugh! Cute outfit!

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