If you've read this post, you already know I'm self-employed and this last month was pretty crazy for me, work-wise. I had a few things going on at once making my schedule not exactly hate my life but I was far from loving it for sure. What made the matters worse was seeing a loved one kicking it back and enjoying his life day in, day out. Watching him really made me think I chose the wrong species for incarnation this time around.
Tuesday, April 30 2013, through my eyes:
07:15 - Got up, put on my trusty sweatpants and t-shirt.
07:17 - Made myself a cup of coco, filled my dog's bowls with water and dog food, gave him his pill with a teaspoon of cheese spread (Because we didn't get him neutered, he has trouble with an enlarged prostate so he has to get his pill everyday or else he can't pee. My advice to male readers: Get your balls chopped off as soon as possible.).
07:25 - Walked the dog.
07:40 - Turned on my computer and started working (ignoring the dog staring at me because if I looked at him, he'd think it was play time).
14:20 - Saw what time it was, decided I must be getting hungry so I ate one of those frozen dinners, which are very bad for you but taste really good.
14:40 - Walked the dog.
15:05 - Started working.
17:35 - Ran out of something, went to an office supply store, before I left the dog barked for a few moments (He's a very co-dependent creature, he'd live in my pocket or under my shirt if that were possible.).
17:55 - Got back from the store, the dog almost wagged his tail off, had to pet him for a minute or so or else he wouldn't calm down, started working.
19:30 - Walked the dog.
20:15 - Started working.
23:15 - My boyfriend came by, couldn't ignore him so I had to stop working.
23:20 - The dog, the boyfriend and me sat on the couch, watched TV, the dog was in the middle (where else) and both of us had to pet and cuddle him or else he wouldn't stop scratching.
00:05 - Went to bed, out cold.
Tuesday, April 30 2013, through my dog's eyes:
07:15 - Woke up.
07:17 - Drank some water (finally she decided to fill the bowl again) and got some yummy white stuff (my favorite moment of the day or at least top 3 easy).
07:18 - Went back to my bed, it was way too early for me, dude.
07:25 - Had to go out for a walk (I hate walking this early, the grass is wet and I get my balls all soaked and cold, walking me this early is just so inconsiderate.).
07:40 - Got home, she took my collar off and started toweling me dry - if we slept a little longer, you wouldn't have to do this annoying shit! Ok, rubbing my belly does feel kind of nice...
07:41 - Followed her into her room, sat behind her as she sat on her chair, stared at the back of her head, making her look at me.
07:44 - Staring didn't work.
07:45 - Drank some water out of boredom.
07:46 - Licked the water bowl dry out of boredom.
07:47 - Came back to her room, lay down thinking what to do next.
07:52 - Fell asleep from too much thinking.
10:35 - Woke up, licked my front left paw, thought it was something there, it wasn't, thinking what to do next.
10:42 - Fell asleep from too much thinking.
12:05 - Woke up, went to the kitchen to drink some water, the bowl was empty so I lay down on the kitchen floor, waiting for her to fill it again.
12:11 - Still waiting.
12:14 - Accidentally fell asleep, damn.
13:25 - Woke up, got back to her room, sat behind her, tried staring again.
13:28 - Felt tired from sitting, had to lie down.
13:37 - Fell asleep (so tired, dude...).
14:20 - The bitch woke me up!
14:21 - No, it was fine, she went to the kitchen, that meant it was LUNCH TIME!! I like lunch time, there's always something in it for me so I don't mind being woken up for LUNCH TIME!! (What are we having today?)
14:22 - She saw my water bowl was empty and filled it (Who cares about the stupid water, dude, let's eat!!).
14:40 - Went out for a walk and it was so frigging hot! I peed a little, I pooped a little, I sniffed a little, but mostly I just wanted to go back inside (I wonder how do I make her carry me...).
15:05 - Got back home, no toweling (thank the lord), WATER TIME!!
15:07 - Emptied the water bowl. Now what?
15:08 - Followed her into her room and that bitch was glued to the computer again. I hate technology!
15:09 - In my desperate attempt to make her stop, I started licking her leg.
15:12 - Couldn't feel my tongue anymore, had to stop (all that licking in vain...).
15:20 - Fell asleep.
17:35 - She woke me up... What? She's leaving?! NO. DON'T GO. Where are you going? WAIT. I WANNA GO WITH YOU! NO! NO, NO!
17:36 - Lay down by the front door, waited.
17:55 - SHE'S HOME! SHE'S HOME! I thought she'd never come back, but she did, she came back!! Now rub my belly, bitch.
17:57 - What? This is all I get? Fine. I'll pee in your shoe one day or chew your face off while you sleep, you'll see...
18:03 - Fell asleep, tired from excitement.
18:50 - Woke up, licked my balls a little, changed my position, fell asleep again.
19:30 - She woke me up, we went out for a walk. (It was nice, I found a piece of something tasty and she didn't saw me eat it because she was on her phone - I love technology! We saw a cat, the fat bastard attacked me and she scared him away, I love it when she does that, it shows that she cares. I peed a little, I pooped a little, I sniffed a little and then I just wanted to go back inside (I wonder how do I make her carry me...).)
20:15 - Back home again. Now what?
20:21 - Fell asleep, tired from the walk.
23:15 - The doorbell woke me up, the dude came. I like him, he always brings me stuff and plays with me - he knows he has to go through me to get to her. I make the rules, he's well aware of that, he ain't stupid.
23:20 - COUCH TIME!! That's my favorite time in the world. I just look at her with my big brown eyes and she feels so guilty for abandoning me the entire day that she pets me like crazy for what feels like hours. Humans are so easy. Now rub my belly, bitch.
00:05 - Finally went to bed. (I was so tired, it was a long day, dude!)
I don't know why people think the term "a dog's life" implies a hard and unpleasant existence... When your only problem is being alone for 20 minutes, you know you've got it made.
Have an awesome weekend, everyone! Thanks for reading, it literally makes my day when I hear people read what I write so - THANK YOU. There are new posts coming up every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, so you're more than welcome to come back next Monday!