This is not going to be a funny post, I just want to get something off my chest because I didn't get the opportunity to do it in due time.
Yesterday, I was at a picnic because one of my friends celebrated his birthday and while we were eating, someone, let's call him Baltazar, said that it's imperative for an aspiring DJ to move to Barcelona or Ibiza, because Spain is where it's all happening now and if you're not there, you're not going to make it. I disagreed and then Baltazar and his friend brought up one Slovene DJ, who furthered his career by moving to Ibiza where he met some other famous DJ, and I said: "Just because he bumped into someone, who's already made a name for himself, doesn't mean he made it big too." After both of them saying I didn't know what I was talking about, Baltazar told a little anecdote about another huge DJ, who supposedly made it just because his toes touched the holy ground of Ibiza and finished his tale with: "But I'm sure you know nothing about this." And smirked. I hate it when people smirk, especially when they smirk at me and of course I wanted to wipe the smirk right off his face, which I started to do - verbally. All of a sudden, I felt a shove under the table coming from a certain someone. Oh, hell no you didn't. Besides the shove being totally uncalled for, it was also insincere because I know he agrees with me since we were recently talking about how DJs spend their entire summers there and have nothing to show for it in the end.
The story of like-minded, creative people gathering in one place is older than all of the people chewing grilled meat at that table combined. Yes, Hemingway went to Paris where he rubbed elbows with Gide, Miró, Picasso, Debussy, Stravinsky, Pound, Joyce, Stein and many others, but them migrating alone is not what made these people great and there are many other artists and scientists, who stayed put, and people still speak highly of them, you are just not necessarily one of those people. In our times, the myth of a "creative" promised land is outdated and chewed up, you just haven't spat it out yet because you like how it tastes. But I'm telling you, don't waste your last cents on an airplane ticket to anywhere to make it big, because only Peter Pan found the Never Never Land.
True, that Slovene DJ got a push in the right direction because he brown-nosed someone on Ibiza, who's already made it (not on Ibiza if I may add), but there's another Slovene DJ, who never lived on that particular island and has reached somewhat greater success (although I'm not saying he's the measure for the latter, but makes for a good comparison). And what's more, dismissing me just because I don't know a certain fact about some famous person is pretty lame. No, I don't know every DJ's life story, but neither do you, you're simply making a generalization based on those three you do know. Just because you and your neighbor have, let's say, 6-inch dicks, it doesn't mean all dicks are 6 inches long, it just means you're grounding your theory on the limited number of facts you have.
The reason why you sound half-smart right now is because you have one of my chromosomes, but I have two of them and none of yours, so figure out for yourself how smart that makes me. And if you don't get this, it's because you're one X short. Yes, I have boobs, yes, I have long hair, yes, I have an orange maxi dress on, yes, I'm not agreeing with you and yes, I'm definitely not being quiet about it because you're big, you're men and there's two of you - as far as I'm concerned, that could be just two dick('s)heads talking, while I'm simply not that of a dick to undermine you or your opinion, even though it's CLEAR you have no idea that what you're saying is bullshit. So F U for saying I don't know what I'm talking about. And F U for shoving me under the table. If I had a mic, this is how I'd finish.
Shorts: Zara + DIY
Boots: Dr. Martens + DIY
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