Jan 15, 2014

Why Is Masturbation Better than Sex

For Peet's Sake blog red blazer jeggings skinny jeans leopard high top sneakers

      Please, don't be fooled by the title and deduce that I claim or think that masturbation is better than sex across the board. There are pros and cons to both of these two steamy (if done right) acts and I originally wanted to do a pros and cons post on masturbation but when I put the list together, there were a bazillion pros and only 1 valid con (you only have 2 hands at your disposal) and that is no bueno because I need structure, I need order - yes, there's a bit, just a tiny morsel of OCD in me - so there has to be an equal amount of both pros and cons. That's why I decided to just write a post of 10 reasons why I find masturbation to be better than sex and here they are:
1. It's easier to hide what you're doing if/when you get caught. If there's another naked person next to/on top of/under/behind/above you when your roommate/sister/dad/kid/grandma walks in, it's pretty damn hard hiding that you're a horny little weasel.
2. If you're a girl: no one looks at you with disdain if a vagina fart comes to an existence. Or an actual fart. If you're a guy: you can fart your butt off while you're at it as much as you like.
3. There's no pressure to perform and whip out your mad porn star skills - it's just you, there's no one to impress.

5. Masturbation ALWAYS ends with an orgasm. Again, don't be misled into thinking I'm not sexually satisfied. I can remember maybe only 5 occasions when sexual intercourse didn't end orgasmically for me in my entire life. On the other hand (my hand), I know for a fact that there was never a situation where masturbation didn't end happily. Maybe I'm just that good or that in touch with myself. Get it - in touch with myself, wink wink, smiley face (the one with X for eyes and its tongue sticking out, what else). That's why masturbation wins hands down. Or should I say hands on?
6. No need for condoms, contraceptive pills, IUDs and thus - my absolute favorite - NO BABIES.
7. No one looks at you weird if you yell out or moan the wrong name like for example Johnny (Depp), Jason (Statham), Gina (Gershon) or Jenna (Marbles).
8. No one is forcing you to do things you don't want to.
9. You don't have to wait for your partner(s) to finish too when you're done. Or you don't have to be afraid you'll get cheated out of your happy ending if they beat you to the punch. It's all about you, you're the center and the outskirts of your attention - how often do you have the luxury to enjoy such a situation?
10. Nobody's feelings get hurt if you check who just texted you during the act.

      This would be some of the aspects that are in favor of masturbation. There are of course LOADS of others too, but as I've said earlier - I need structure and 10 feels like a marvelous structure, so I'll stop with the reason number 10. For those of you who are raising your eyebrows and shaking your heads at the thought of masturbation, wanking off, jerking off, beating off and playing with yourself, don't. Even Dr. Seuss said: "If you never did, you should. These things are fun and FUN IS GOOD." So just relax and love thyself.

For Peet's Sake blog leopard sneakers skinny jeans red watch green nail polish
For Peet's Sake blog red blazer print top girl sitting on stairs
Blazer - Stradivarius, jeggings - Tally Weijl, top - DIY (gift), sneakers - eBay, watch - eBay
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      Peet

30 comments:

  1. Omg, your post are just so fun... :)
    Kisses
    www.beingbeautifulandpretty.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. HIGH-larious as usual. I'm gonna go for a very safe "no-comment" on the actual post (but know that I did lol. A LOT)
    So instead I'll just talk a bunch about your outfit. Loving the pops of red on your watch and lips ! Oh and your trainers are awesome!
    I never really get to wear trainers but I'd like to think that I too, would go for leopard-print-fabulousness!

    Hayfa
    www.londonloafers.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. Haha, too funny! Many good points ;) Loving the Johnny Depp shout-out! xo

    -Jen

    www.vibrantbeautyblog.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes. Johnny Depp will be forever in my ... Heart.:)

      Delete
  4. I'm going to bashfully avoid the post and simply lust after your shoes!! How perfect are those shoes? Leopard tennis shoes .. <3

    Monica, www.pear-shaped-gal.com

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  5. OMG Love this! Considering I'm fucking single I'm the only one who is gonna satisfy me at the moment lol (shagging randoms isn't really my thing) I LOL'd hard at the glow in the dark anus, you crack me up! xx

    www.hausofsarahrachel.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  6. xD

    Jenna Marbles.... mmmmmmmmmmmmmm ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Me veseli, da vsi mislimo na Jenno.:D

      Delete
  7. Peeeeet, I love how you absolute give zero fucks about what people will say about your topics and opinions, haha :-D Loved it. And I'm not gonna lie, I love me a lil' self-induced lovin' as well, who doesn't?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I know I do.:D Although I have to admit, I do think about what other people will or might say but in the end ... I just don't care. It's very freeing actually.:)

      Delete
  8. Good morning beautiful!! Thank you for your sweety coment!!
    Your look is ideal and fresh :)
    I've started with a new photographer "Ivan Montero"
    Come to enjoy our new creation :)
    http://peaceinmyshoes.blogspot.com.es/

    ReplyDelete
  9. I love your outfit and your no self-restraint. Everyone should be a little more like you.

    http://petitemaisonoffashion.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Self-restrain? What is self-restrain?

      Delete
  10. Ahahaah Peet, well who can blame you? Lol, you made me so smile! But I have to admit all your points are really reasonable, lol! And dear, you are looking too cool, Im in love with your leo sneakers which is very well paired with red. I like that quote, it could be applied even for other things. Kisses, have a goodnight and an amazing weekend!:**

    ReplyDelete
  11. If my anus was glow in the dark, I'd be freakin' stoked!! Just sayin.

    xo Ashley
    thetiniestfirecracker.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. EXACTLY. A glow in the dark anus is an ass-et.:D

      Delete
  12. Wow I do not know anyone whose anus glows in the dark but hot damn I am intrigued. I need to meet one STAT! I think number 5 sums it all up perfectly. It's the winning point I mean. Enough said!

    SDMxx
    www.daringcoco.com

    ReplyDelete
  13. hahaaa.. once again your writing amaze me! you have some good points girl, and you look absolutely fantastic! love the sneakers and the red jacket!
    Have a great weekend,

    http://rosdays.blogspot.co.il/

    ReplyDelete
  14. I guess it doesn't matter what you're writing about, I always love it and it always makes me laugh. well and I'm sure I haven't seen anyone else writing about a topic like that in their blogs. so you're definitely doing something that other don't and I love it ;) I also love your outfit by the way. those sneakers and the watch are my favourites.

    Maiken,
    Maikeni blogi - part of me

    ReplyDelete
  15. funny but of course and serious too...like

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  16. Oh yeah, #6 is definitely my favorite! There's nothing like a baby to turn me off. ; )

    http://naomemandeflores.com/en

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  17. What you like ha ha. Would you believe me if I said I've never really sat down and thought about the pros and cons *smile*? Having read yours however, number 4 applies to me most. I really need to get something done about this third nipple!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. For a second there I thought you have a glowing 'problem'.:D

      Delete
  18. Hahaha too good! I agree with you on these :)
    xx
    www.junewantsitall.com

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  19. Balance is key, me thinks. But really love the fact that you finish the copy off saying "love thyself" :D
    Also, you look awesome in the pics, but that's a given. I gave up on showering you with compliments as even I sound repetitive to myself.

    ReplyDelete
  20. I LOVE it...what a stylish and FUN post once again :)

    Check out my blog today...5 tips for a Fab kitchen on a budget :)

    Have a great day beautiful

    LOVE Maria at inredningsvis - Swedish decor, food, and fashion

    ReplyDelete
  21. NICE SNEAKERS! :*

    GIVEAWAY ON MY BLOG! http://landing-in-fashion.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  22. I especially agree with point 9 ! I get all sorts of sleepy when "I'm done" and it's so annoying having to go on because your partner isn't XD I'm worse than a man and I'm aware. The thing that makes me happier in the whole world is coming at the same time. Not because is a wonderful thing or whatnot, it's just because I get to sleep afterwards.

    ReplyDelete

Hi there. Thanks for stopping by and reading my blog. I read every comment and reply to all the questions, so please, speak your mind.