Feb 7, 2014

Let's Not Sleep Together: Pros and Cons of Sleeping Together


      You know how old couples (my grandparents or Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick for example) don't sleep together in the same bed or even bedroom anymore? I'd always thought that that was so sad and unnecessary but then yesterday happened and I started thinking - these old people really are on to something! There's of course the constant squirming (mine just as much as his) which is never in sync. There should be something like a sync button on the side of the bed for that. Or a set of two straitjackets. And of course, when I want to stay up and read with lights on, he wants to sleep and vice versa. And of course, when I want to sleep with the window open, he wants it closed and vice versa. So basically all of that happened yesterday, but the thing that bothered and bothers me the most is the frigging heat. His heat.
      When he falls asleep, he heats up like a ... I don't know what the fuck heats up when it sleeps but he does. A lot. And yesterday I thought I'd sweat my skin away or start to boil and evaporate in thin air. Luckily, our bed is next to a wall so when he and thus the bed and thus I heated up, I was able to snuggle up to the wall - to get away from the lava boy and to counterattack the scorching heat. I already told him countless times, but this time I mean it - tonight I'm measuring his temperature. Rectally. I swear to God I will. (Funny, how you'd never think 'God' and 'rectally' will be linked together but somehow priests found a way to fill that crack. I mean gap. Bridge that gap. That's what I meant and I'm sticking to it.)
       But before we go to bed and I take his temperature, I still have to put together the today's post and in the light of recent events, I've weighted the pros and cons of two people sleeping together. And here they are:

+PRO: You get spooned. And there really aren't a whole lot of things in this world that beat getting spooned.
-CON: You can end up being the big spoon permanently (like me) so there isn't much in it for you.

-CON: There's a lack of space and thus there's a constant battle over blankets and mattress space and perpetual pillow fights. But not the ones you imagine Playboy Playmates having in their little bunny house.
+PRO: It feels really good when you win that extra centimeter/inch of a mattress or covers. I always feel like the queen of the blanket then.

+PRO: When it's cold, you can use your partner as a source of heat and steal their warmth.
-CON: Usually when it's cold, it's cold for the both of you and there's a 50/50 chance you'll get freezing cold feet shoved in between your thighs, next to your calves, down your pajama next to your butt, under your armpits, in-between your boobs, you name it.

-CON: You can get hit during the night because the other person is tossing and turning like a sausage on a grill and then you suddenly wake up in the middle of the night because he elbows you in the nose or knees you in your kidneys and you want to strangle him.
+PRO: When your partner's been annoying you the entire day, you can punch them in their face on purpose and say that it was all an accident. "I must've just turned in my sleep. Sorry."

+PRO: You don't have to put up with bad morning breath.
-CON: You can't play the bad breath morning game where you bad breath bomb your sleeping buddy. Whenever I wake up before my boyfriend (which is often enough for me to become a bad breath morning game champion) I like to lick the tip of his nose with my wretchedly smelling tongue right before I get out of bed. I sure am not a morning person, but I do love that morning game. Want a little tip? Make sure to start at the septum so you run your tongue over the sleeping victim's nostrils so you scrape some stale saliva on the inside of their nose. You're welcome.


-CON: One of my pet peeves is when someone scrapes my leg with their toenails. It freaks me out, I got chills down my spine just writing about this. Of course my boyfriend is fully aware of that and regularly tends to his toenails. Not. I think he purposely keeps them extra long and sharp so he can reach me from another room not just from the other side of the bed with them - just because he knows it bugs me. It's like sleeping with a wolverine and that's an indisputable con for me.
+PRO: You can find out your partner's pet peeve and annoy them till the end of time. Or until you wise up and get separate beds/bedrooms. Remember - she who has the last laugh ...

-CON: If you sleep alone and an intruder or serial killer comes in the room, there's almost a definite chance you'll end up hurt or dead.
-PRO: If you're sleeping with someone else and an intruder or serial killer comes in the room, they might decide to off your bedmate instead of you and finally, you'll get the bed to yourself.

-CON: You can't wear what you want to bed. Even though my boyfriend hates my pajamas (even this one in the pictures) and calls them grandma pajamas, I'd actually much rather wear onesies. But since I know those would freak him even more, I oblige. For now.
+PRO: On the other hand, not wearing onesies is a definite plus for me because I get up and pee at least 2 times per night and an overall would make my peeing trips a bitch - I'd have to get fully undressed in the cold bathroom at 2 a.m. just to be able to pee.

-CON: You have to explain to your partner sleeping next to you why your ex is drunk texting you at 4 in the morning.
+PRO: You can keep a close watch on how many drunk exes are texting your partner. Which can basically be a con too since what you don't know can't hurt you and that just further proves my point - old people really know best.


      Don't forget to follow FPS via Twitter, Bloglovin and/or Google+. And do come by again sometime to see what's new on the blog. Posting days are Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays so hopefully see you then!

      Peet

31 comments:

  1. LOVE LIVE LOVE you girl.. How do you always come up with such posts.. I am so intresting...
    I hate to wear onse to bed for the sane reason.
    Keep in touch
    www.beingbeautifulandpretty.com

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  2. Replies
    1. Well thanks, babe!!:D Love you too.:D

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  3. Haha, gosh, I used to do such lists for anything I had to decide. This is awesome, love it so much! Luckily I don't have to share my bed (or room) with anybody else :D

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    1. Yes, you are lucky if you ask me.:)

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  4. Ah, such a fun post! My boyfriend and I used to fight stealthily for blankets and bed space, but we've now found our balance. Let accidental kicks and elbows during the night too- but I like the idea of feeling justified to punch him the next day if one of those nocturnal jabs does happen :)

    -Jen

    www.vibrantbeautyblog.com

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    Replies
    1. We still haven't found our balance. Probably because WE're still waiting for ME to give up.:D

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  5. You should invent the sync button, I'm sure you'd make tons of money. I like your PJ's too.

    xoxo
    http://petitemaisonoffashion.blogspot.com/

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  6. haha, another brilliant post, Peet! I really enjoyed reading your thoughts since I have wondered too why some old people sleep in separate rooms. the part about toenails is hilarious, by the way, it still makes me laugh :D but when it comes to warmth then usually my fiance is the warm one when I'm feeling the coldest so that's definitely a huge plus for me. but when one of us has caught a cold or something then it's a torture to sleep together because the sick one is annoyingly hot, he/she wakes up in the middle of the night and the noise wakes up the other one as well and so on, that sucks. oh, one more plus! I get back massages from him! that's definitely a huge plus! :D

    Maiken,
    Maikeni blogi - part of me

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    1. Ok, those back massages before you fall asleep are a nice touch, I'll give you that. But all of the rest... Is just annoying.:D

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  7. My ex is warm warm warm like a radiator and I love it. It's the best.

    The licking nose things, oh dear!

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  8. I love sleeping with my boyfriend, I dont think I have any cons to it haha!! Check out my blog baby, I have nominated you!
    xoxo

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    Replies
    1. I've checked it, dear! Thanks for the nomination, I'll definitely answer your questions!;)

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  9. Good one Peet. As much as there are a lot of cons, I guess I'm the sappy loving types so I'd always want my boyfriend cuddled next to me... except for when its hot maybe. But usually he's the one feeling hot while sleeping instead of me while I wanna cuddle so its a total opposite situation
    xx
    www.junewantsitall.com

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  10. OMG girl, you make me laugh so much! :D
    And I would love to wear onesies too, but, like you I almost every night have to go to the bathroom, so, that not really an option! haha
    With all the pros and cons, I love to sleep with my boyfriend.

    ;)

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    1. Yes, those onesies are so adorable, but how does one pee in them???:D

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  11. I busted out laughing at your rectal thermometer comment .. now that was funny ;-)

    The spouse and I don't sleep together .. he snores louder than the TV.

    Monica, www.pear-shaped-gal.com

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  12. hahhaaa.. Peet, as always you bring up such an interesting topics! I love to sleep with my boyfriend.. it's warm and cozy,
    on the other hands-on the nights whren he's away, I sleep so deep.. soo.. it's a real dilemma :)

    kisses,
    http://rosdays.blogspot.co.il/

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    1. See!!:D I love my bf too, but if only... I don't know... Maybe we should get a bigger bed so I could escape the heat.:)

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  13. Hahaha! You're too funny Peet! I think I'm kinda of a lava girl. Thank God for air conditioner! And I love your pajamas! Grandma pajamas??? He's out of his mind (and he should see what MY grandma wears to sleep). :)

    http://naomemandeflores.com/en

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  14. I never laugh so hard especially about the pros and con if a serial killer come to the room, I do not know I how could handle extreme heat from someone that crazy hot. Great post.
    http://tifi11.blogspot.com

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    1. I know that we all get hotter when we sleep, our temperature simply rises, it's a fact, but apparently all men get even hotter than women in general! What's up with that??:D

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  15. I'm such a light sleeper and I never get on with someone sharing a room with me let alone a bed. I agree with all those cons for not sleeping together but none of the pros (okay apart from the intruder one but that didn't save that olympians girlfriend in South Africa did it) because I just hate sharing a bed with anyone. I don't even like feet touching me let alone toe nails. Don't get me started about the heat. Even if I'm freezing, Id rather put the heating on or more clothes than be warmed up by someone else's body heat radiating on to my body. And snoring uuuughhh! This could all explain why I am still single!

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  16. Hi Peet! You made me so smile with the intro. Lol, is the same also for me but, since I am a person who really suffers the cold, I enjoy the heat!:P And in fact, is one of the best thing for me of sleeping together. I think all your pro and con are true in some way, is sad that people stop to sleep together when they are older, maybe for snoring trouble :P The bad breath morning game made me so laugh!XD I love your pajama! Hope you had a lovely weekend dear, mine was very lazy and restful..Im already looking forward to the next!:) Kisses dear! xo

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    1. In theory, I like cuddling and sleeping together too, but in reality... I don't know any more. I guess I'm getting old.:D

      Let's hope the weeks goes by quickly and the next weekend lasts forever!;)

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  17. OMG what is it with boys and their toenails?! It is NOT that hard to trim them...

    xo Ashley
    thetiniestfirecracker.com

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  18. I got a King bed all to myself muhuhahahaha....although I do miss spooning :( Love the pj top by the way!! xx

    www.hausofsarahrachel.blogspot.com

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  19. My bf hated my onesie at first. There was an option for me to be polite about it and go back to wearing PJs (as you did - super kind of you). I chose option two & make war. I was fighting for my onesie. Now we both wear onesies.

    Meanwhile about the whole lava situation. I so GET you. It's perfect in winter but sucks so many balls in summer. But my lava boy's temperature is INSANE. WINDOWS GET sweaty from his temperature. It's absolutely insane. I am actually at my wits end. It can be tiring to wake up in a puddle of sweat.

    Would I like to sleep alone? I am gonna say YES and feel so sad about it because the pros are strong. but stretching yourself into a human star position ALL OVER a king size bed is amazeballs.

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  20. I hate to be always the big spoon! And I always giving massages and not receiving any in return.
    Wow, my boyfriend often makes rare movements when he's asleep and he (I assume unintentionally) gives me incredible nudges. Or he screams, or he has spasms ... So it's "really great" sleeping with him.

    ohhhh god saliva game! Eschatological. Perfect.
    XXX
    http://muerdelaespina.blogspot.com.es/

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