I still remember like it was yesterday when I was asking myself: "What's wrong with camel toe? Why do people condemn it so much? Nobody complains over boobs showing their form through clothes so what's the difference with some vagina showing?" It's just some outline of labia majora, really, what's all the hubbub about it? I kept thinking about it and I really wanted to write a post on the subject but I somehow didn't see the topic alone forming a legitimate, substantial post so I decided to discard the idea and I was bummed - I really wanted to write about camel toe. And I had a catchy sentence too: 'What's wrong with camel toe? It's just vagina cleavage.' But then I started to think about women with fake boobs wearing bras and people wearing their dogs in bags and it hit me: "I can't make short, individual posts about stupid things which annoy me and which I don't get, that would be to easy and quite frankly too lame, but I can, in fact, make a post about a selection of things I don't get. Yes. That's exactly what I should do." And I did. Exactly one year and one day ago, I posted the first Things I Don't Get post and I'm really happy I did because the TIDG series has been serving me beautifully as a venting platform. And I've actually learned something new too - on TIDG #5, a gentleman commented and explained why the theaters are so damn cold and now I know. It still bothers me though. But that's not the point, the point is that today I have another set of things I don't get and if you do get any of these, please, feel free to enlighten me.
- Why do people keep saying that the combination of black and white is monochromatic (in shades of only one color)? And don't give me that black-is-not-a-color-black-is-absence-of-color bullshit. So if I have black hair, I don't have any color hair - I'm not black, I'm bald? If you can buy a can of something than it exists and you can buy a can of black paint, you don't just buy a can of nothing, so black color much exists, deal with it.
- How come people wear winter everything and summer shoes? If it's so cold that you need to wear a scarf, don't you also need to wear socks?
- Why is the packaging always at least one third too big for the thing it's containing? I know it's supposed to trick us into thinking we get more stuff than we actually do, but we see right through that, we're on to you, marketing people. If I get three chips in a bag, why does it have to be big enough to fit a medium size zebra?
- How could spooning become so popular when it's so annoying?? It's not like sex which is supposed to be fun for both (or all) parties, because when it comes to spooning, one party always loses: can't position yourself properly, your arm is falling asleep, it's too frigging hot, whenever someone wants to turn it's always a tumultuous process, your privates smother in your partner's farts ... Should I go on?? Who the fuck made spooning popular?!
- Throwback posts. I don't get them. Why would you repost something you already posted? If you like some posts and you want to remember people of them, post a link, don't just repost the entire thing, that's cheating. Although ... On second thought ... Fuck it, I'm going to start posting those too, so from now on, every Friday, I'm going to post something I've already posted, it seem sensible. When you think about it, The Times, the Rolling Stone magazine, Vogue etc. are all publishing old articles all the time. Right?
- Why are people hanging pictures of themselves around the house as art, you know, a giant naked picture of yourself hanging in the living room? You think you're a God's masterpiece or something? You sure are a piece of work, I'll give you that, because that's just creepy ...
- Why do they even sell deodorants with aluminum based ingredients if they know that those cause breast cancer? Wouldn't it be better just to stop putting stuff in stuff that could kill people?
- How come animal rights activists don't demand they stop mating and breeding French Bulldogs and Boston Terriers? Over 80 % of puppies of those breeds have to be born with C sections because the heads are to large for mothers' hips so they can't give birth naturally. In nature, those breeds would never survive, it's just human vanity 'because they're so cute' that allows for this to happen. But isn't it sad? Do what you want with your body, but don't be inconsiderate to animals who can't stand up for themselves. Stop breeding/buying French Bulldogs and Boston Terriers. Fucking morons.
- How come there's no 'fuck you' smiley? If it is, I need to know about it because that would make my life a whole lot easier.
- Why would anyone post a video of their childbirth on the Internet? Here's the link (if I had to see it, you do too). If it's so special and spiritual and private, why show the act of squeezing something purple and slimy through your vagina online? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!
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